FUCK YOU! FUCK ALL OF YOU!

You mutha fuckers! You all voted for the WRONG monkey! Damn! How fucking hard is it to wright ANGRY ALBINO SOCK MONKEY??? I know that bastard Bush resembles me but is much uglier so I'll let most of you bastards off the hook on this one.

I must apologize for not posting sooner, but I've been on one big ass mutha' fucking bender since I lost the election. It's all been a blur but a few days ago I woke up in a pile of empty Jack Daniels bottles, beer bottles and a pool of my own vomit. This place smells like the fucking monkey house at the fucking zoo. I'm considering just setting a match to it all and walking away, but I'm not entirely sure my insurance covers fire, etc., etc. Yadda, yadda, yadda, legal mumbo jumbo bullshit. As soon as this gooddammed hangover subsides I'll make a decision. At least I hope this is a hang over. Maybe I suffered a fucking anurism from all the booze, that happened to one of my uncles. He was never right after that, always trying to fuck all the cats in the neighborhood.

At least I was successfull in one endevor. I did manage to sell of one memeber of my lazyass family. I'm quite happy to be rid of his ass. Anyone wanting another member of my family, drop me a line and we can negotiate.

I need to get the fuck going for now. Gotta go beat the kids - they've had a week off, can't let them get soft ya know.

Go Vote You Sons A Bitches!

Today is election day. Get off your ass and go vote! I'll be out at the polls today (I'll even take a photo to prove it). I'll be voting at least once. I hate both of the mutha-fucking lieing-ass pansy rich boy candidates. They both suck. It's not about voting for the lesser of two evils though, you can vote for the most evil - and I'm not talking about that crack-head loud mouth Ralph fucking Nader, I'm talking about me. I'll be writing in my own name each time I vote. Gotta love democracy.

Write me in bitches or I'll rape your dog! Spell it right - Angry Albino Sock Monkey. Do it for democracy. Do it for me - or else!

Albino Slavery

heh. Sounds better than White Slavery. Isn't that just a fucked up phrase? As if thoes of the non-caucasion persuasion have a monopoly on slavery. HAH!

Anyway, I've succeeded in selling one of my family members. I may negotiate to get rid of both of their bitch-asses. Anybody wanting to help me earn some cash, send me an email (angryalbinosockmonkey at gmail.com) with an offer and I'll send you some one from my fucking family. What?? You'd sell your family too if they were a bunch of beer drinking, tree-swinging, bad tempered, feces-throwing primates. Oh, wait... I see some of you have that look like "Fuck, you just described my trailer park living family".

Anyway, I need crack money... er... I mean MILK money - I gotta baby ya know - so BUY AN ANGRY ALBINO SOCK MONKEY!!! It'll make you popular!